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Neil and Sally Jenkinson had been looking forward to their summer holiday ever since they confirmed their booking in February. After a number of soggy years camping in the Lake District in England they were going to make a break from their normal routine and rent a forest cabin in North Yorkshire. Equipped with a lounge-diner, two bedrooms, hot tub, shower and a small kitchen, Sally would still have to do some cooking but they could afford to go out for some of the meals now that Neil had been promoted and a nice lump sum of back-pay had just reached his bank account.
The kids couldn’t wait either. Daniel and Jessica, or Dan and Jess as everyone called them, were twins. They were quite different in appearance and in their personalities and interests but usually they got on well together and they were intensely loyal to each other. Born on different days, either side of midnight, they had just turned eighteen in March of that year and, in many ways, this holiday might well be one of the last that the whole family, mum, dad and the kids, spent together. College and different routes would bring changes, all part of the normal rites of passage.
I’m Sally, by the way. I’ll be explaining what happened that summer and sharing my feelings about it all with you. You often read that it’s ‘a true story’: well this one isn’t but it’s based on our own very true story. I’ve had to alter lots of things so my real family is hidden from prying eyes but all of us would recognise from our tale what we did, said and felt, even with the disguises. One thing you can be sure of: it changed my life and that of all our family. After the adventure in the forest our family was a very different ‘beast’ to the one that drove off happily from Chester on the 5th of August 2004. Not that this is an unhappy tale. I wouldn’t want to put you off or make you close me down. I think you’ll enjoy our story. For me it was a roller-coaster ride as I was very naive and innocent in some respects in how I initially handled what happened. We are real people and that makes things more complicated, emotions less clear-cut and, well, some of us when frightened or nervous thought we could solve things by losing our tempers. Of course that never worked! Some of you may find our story and how we worked it out far easier to accept; others may know that what happened to us is not that uncommon; finally some of you may feel that even these days what happened was wrong. I don’t know. Neil said if I wrote it all down I’d be better able to order my own thoughts and feelings. It has helped…
Having left Chester at about 5.30 p.m. approximately an hour after Neil got home from work, with our MPV bursting at the seams with four adults and all the paraphernalia we each deemed indispensable for a fortnight in the woods, it should have been no great feat to get to the Dalby Forest by about 8 p.m. when the warden at the centre said he would be going home for the night.
Well, Neil has never been a natural at way-finding and being lost is a regular occurrence and the cause of many an argument. What with me trying to read a ten-year old moth-eaten AA Motoring Atlas that looked like it had been variously trampled, spilt on and left on a stormy hillside for a week so that some pages only opened unwillingly and Neil turning the wrong way somewhere near Levisham, I think it was, we were soon in the middle of nowhere useful. Dan would have been better suited to the task of map-reading but he would rightly have mocked the atlas we had. We drove on until we reached a village and Dan volunteered to go into the pub, ‘The Black Lion’ [all my Lions are usually Red or Golden]. That was probably a good idea as Dan would understand any answers he received better than Neil or I would. To cut a long story short, Dan emerged with a smile and an old chap who continued to gesture, waving his stick, as he explained what was needed.
Dan got back in the car and said: ‘We’ve to turn round and go back to the T junction. Then it’s a left and a right and turn into the forest. Then..’
‘Hold on,’ said Neil. ‘Just tell me the first bit!’
Anyway we turned round and between them Dan and Neil got us to the Dalby Forest Cabins Centre by about 8.30 p.m. Predictably the warden had just left. I contributed helpfully by saying; ‘That’s a fine start. I’m not sleeping in that all night!’ ‘That’ was the MPV.
‘Don’t panic, mum,’ said Jess who is always calm even if she’s nothing particularly helpful to add. In fact that’s what I told her:
‘There’s no point in being calm if you’ve nothing helpful to add, Jessica. You might as well have kept quiet!’ That’s me, I’m afraid, short fuse, too easily upset and never, ever to blame.
Neil said he’d go over and see if our cabin was locked. He came back with a smile on his face.
‘Got it?’ I asked.
‘No, but there’s a note saying the key’s with the people in cabin 16,’ he answered.
‘Leave it to me,’ said Dan, who sped off to collect the key. Luckily we still had an hour or so of daylight to get all our stuff from the car güvenilir bahis into the cabin. Jess and I worked hard and I managed to squeeze in a ‘Sorry, Jess’ to her whilst we worked. Normally we tell each other our secrets so my frustration at the start of the holiday when I wanted everything to go right had spoilt things. I was sorry and I wanted Jess and me to get back to our normal closeness.
‘Right,’ she said. I knew that at eighteen I needed to treat her more as an adult, a mate, not as a child, but it’s not always easy. I suppose I never wanted them to grow up too fast; now I had to let them make their own lives, their own choices without interfering or passing judgement. ‘Hey, I really am sorry, Jess,’ I tried.
‘Yea, I know, forget it, mum.’
Now I was going on about it, I realised, and things would be better if I dropped the matter. However another problem soon emerged, in my mind at least. We had thought that we would move one of the single beds in the second bedroom into the lounge so that Dan could sleep there. However both beds were sort of built in to the woodwork of the cabin and clearly weren’t going anywhere.
‘We can share a bedroom, mum, it’s no big deal.’
‘No,’ I said meaning that to be the end of the matter.
‘Mum, we’re eighteen, we’ve been together all our lives, we often share the bathroom in the morning. I know no-one better than I know Dan. Stop looking for crises for heaven’s sake. The matter’s sorted.’ I saw Neil looking at me. He shrugged and gave a little frown which I took to mean I should stop fussing.
‘All right, shall we try and get this holiday into gear?’ I asked.
‘Good idea,’ said Jess.
So they were going to share a bedroom. They hadn’t done that since they were about four years old, I suppose. I mean I’m only thirty-eight, I’m not an old fogey who disapproves of everything, who wants to stop everyone’s fun. But perhaps I do resent their bloody youthfulness.
‘I’m having a glass of wine,’ I announced to anyone who might be listening. And if no-one was, then that was fine too. Alcohol usually mellows me, I told myself. Looking back I can see I needed remedial mellowing urgently.
We eventually gathered in the lounge. The MPV was parked and locked; all our stuff was unpacked and in the right room even if it wasn’t all yet stashed away in the generous cupboard space the cabin enjoyed. Neil and Dan were having a beer, I was smiling into my second glass of wine. The alcohol was having the desired effect and I bet the rest of them were glad about that! Jess had changed into blouse and skirt from her jeans, saying the cabin was pretty hot; she was drinking a coke. It was very warm and I pulled my jumper off – it had been cool outside whilst we were unloading – and slouched back in my armchair.
Not a lot was said: we were all pretty tired I think and it was good just to relax together and not worry about tomorrow or anything else. I was really determined to let someone else spot the next problem. If I saw an issue appearing I told myself I would ignore it and wait and see how the others reacted. After all inside my head I’m still eighteen or nineteen myself, you know. You don’t feel old.
The next part of the story is reconstructed from what Jess told me later. I wrote it up for her. She has read it and suggested some changes so it’s pretty well as she says it happened… Jess was the first to decide to turn in for the night. She went off to bed and the three of us chatted for a while. Dan searched idly through the channels on the TV seeing what he could find of interest whilst Neil and I discussed plans for the next day. Catching a steam train across the moors and down into Whitby seemed like a good idea for a nice day out. Dan nodded but soon got up and said he was off to bed too.
Dan walked into the bedroom and saw his sister sitting on the edge of the bed, combing her hair. She had obviously been to the bathroom as there was a towel thrown on the bed beside her. She was naked to the waist.
‘Ooops, sorry, Jess’ said Dan, backing out of the door.
‘Dan, come back,’ she called him. He came in. ‘If we are going to share for two weeks then there can’t be all this knocking and checking. We just come and go. I don’t mind anyway if you see me with some of my clothes off.’ She was just beginning to blush and rushed on, giggling: ‘Anyway, you owe me one now!’
‘Owe you what?’ said Dan pretending to be dim.
‘A peep!’ said Jess.
Dan laughed. ‘A peep at what?’
‘I’m not answering that one; I’m going to sleep.’
Jess pulled a brief lightweight nightie over her head and slipped her skirt and panties off modestly depriving Dan of any further visions. He sat with his back to Jess and stripped off, wriggling out of his jeans as he sat on the edge of his bed. He swung his legs round and under the duvet.
Dan switched his bedlight off and they lay in darkness together. Dan thought he could hear his sister breathing. ‘You’re very pretty, Jess,’ türkçe bahis he whispered.
After a couple of minutes Jess responded to Dan by asking him: ‘Do you ever think about me in that sort of way, Dan?’
She thought he’d carry on with the silly ‘I don’t understand’ routine but she was wrong.
‘Yes, sometimes I see you changing or something when you haven’t closed your bedroom door or I come into the bathroom and you’re in the shower and I like to see your shape through the frosted glass. You look so nice. Hope you don’t mind.’
‘No, that’s nice. I sometimes watch you when you’re in the shower too. ‘
‘I know,’ said Dan, ‘at least I presumed it was you.’
‘I come to the bathroom especially if I think you’re having a shower.’
No more was said and they both fell asleep. In the morning the sun streamed in through the thin muslin curtains. Dan stirred and sensed Jess was awake but didn’t want to admit it just yet. He got up and walked naked across to his towel. He picked it up but didn’t start to wrap it round his waist until he was near the door. As he opened the door to leave for the bathroom he heard Jess say softly: ‘Thanks, Dan!’
When he returned he had already dried himself off and had the towel round his waist. As he began to dress Jess stood from her bed and pulled her nightie over her head. Now she was naked. She walked without embarrassment but knowing Dan was watching, wanting him to watch, over to her case and bending over it she rooted about for her wrap. Standing facing Dan, who had dropped his towel, she put the wrap on but made no attempt to fasten it, letting Dan look at her. She saw Dan’s lovely thick cock just start to rise. She smiled at Dan, turned and left for the bathroom. When she returned Dan had gone. She was unsure whether to be relieved or disappointed. She thought that for now it was better he had left. Her mind was reeling with desires that were not new to her but which had been kept, restrained as it were, under the surface of her emotional and sexual life. Jess wasn’t a virgin but she wasn’t particularly experienced either and had never had anything more than short-term boy-friends. The only boy she had slept with she regretted; it had been a mistake on her part and she had learnt to be much more circumspect, maybe too cautious even. Why was her brother now turning her feelings upside down? She recognised too that this hadn’t just started; her secret observation of Dan in the shower and his of her had been continuing for some time, simmering gently, as it were. Sharing a room had turned up the sexual heat.
‘I suppose I could say we slept together last night!’ Jess said to herself. ‘I’d love to seem mum’s face if I say that.’
She did tell me but later that day when we were alone. She made it clear it was a joke as she told me but a seed was planted in my mind and I began to wonder just how interested Jess was in her brother.
For all of us that first day was really nice. We drove back down to Pickering and caught the first train into Whitby. Apparently not all the trains are allowed to steam all the way to the coast so we were lucky. Slowly and lazily steaming, the Merchant Navy Class Bulleid Pacific [Neil is a bit of a steam railway geek!] pulled us across the moors and deposited us in the centre of Whitby itself under a blazing sun. Neil was on cloud nine, snapping away with his digital camera taking photos of the loco and stuff. We split up, Dan and Jess went off to check the marina and then go on to the beach; Neil and I wanted to explore the old town, visit the jet jewellery shops [well I did] and climb up to the abbey and enjoy the views. We agreed to meet at the ‘Thieving Crow’ for a fish and chip lunch.
Neil left me near the swing-bridge in the town centre whilst he went back to the bookshop to buy a book he had nearly bought, decided against and now had changed his mind. I had said ‘Get it or you’ll come back next week or something and find it will have gone!’
Suddenly I spotted Dan and Jess leaning on the railing a little further on, downstream from the bridge. They were talking. Dan’s hand slipped to her bottom and just rested there, as if she were his girl; she suddenly raised her face to his and they kissed. They broke apart quickly and looked round. I realised they were checking whether Neil or I were nearby. I dodged behind a parked builder’s van but continued to watch them. They kissed again, longer this time and I could tell Jess was responding to him, moulding her body in to him, consenting to their shared hunger. They parted again and started to walk towards the ‘Thieving Crow’, not holding hands or anything, back in brother and sister mode.
The funny thing was that firstly I wasn’t angry. I was a bit shocked but I realised less shocked than I expected. I loved them both. I was excited as I saw them together. No, what I felt was guilt. I felt totally guilty that I had been watching them like a peeping tom and that they were frightened of me or their dad. I was confused. I wanted to catch them up and show I knew güvenilir bahis siteleri nothing and just act normally but I had to wait for Neil. I couldn’t tell him yet until I had rationalised my own reactions.
Neil arrived with his book of walks in Dalby Forest and we made our way to the restaurant.
‘You all right?’ asked Neil.
‘Yes, sure, why not?’ I snapped but stopped myself and gave him a smile and then pulled him to me and kissed him. ‘I love you,’ I said.
‘What have I done to deserve that?’ he said, but took my hand and we walked on. We saw Dan and Jess looking out for us.
‘Everything all right with you two?’ I asked.
‘Yea,’ said Dan.
‘Course,’ said Jess. ‘Why not?’
I thought she could read my mind and that she suspected I had seen them. Was I that bad at hiding things? We ate lunch and the quality of the food was everything we had expected. It was wonderful. We finished with trifle and then went for another walk, together this time, up above the marina and round onto the old Larpool viaduct that Neil wanted to visit. This time we were all impressed by this huge long brick built viaduct high above the town. It led us back down again by a circular route round eventually to the station. Jess and I walked together and Dan went with his dad.
Suddenly Jess asked: ‘Mum did you see Dan and me at all after we split up this morning?’
I knew I couldn’t lie, and I knew she already had the answer. She can read my eyes or my tone of voice or a slight hesitation, I don’t know which.
‘Yes, I saw you, by the bridge,’ I said.
‘Mum, I’m sorry. You must think we’re dreadful…’
‘Stop,’ I said. ‘I thought you looked beautiful together. I was proud to have such wonderful kids. I won’t tell anyone or say anything. You’re old enough to decide.’ I was trying to learn my lessons.
‘Mum, it might go further. I’m very sorry, mum but I want it to go further.’
She could tell I was unsure what to say. ‘I assumed you’ve been sleeping together,’ I stammered, very unsure of the territory I was entering.
‘No, mum, nothing has ever happened – apart from a bit of watching each other in the shower and things. Until we kissed today. You saw the first time, mum.’
‘I was excited,’ I told her, ‘but I felt ashamed of myself afterwards, guilty of watching something I shouldn’t have intruded on.’
‘Don’t feel like that, mum, I’m glad you saw us, especially since you haven’t killed me yet.’ She laughed nervously. I put my arm round her and gave her a hug.
‘Not long ago I thought I saw you watching Dan in the shower at home, but you darted away,’ I added. ‘Whatever you do I don’t want to lose you, Jess, as my best pal. So I will be happy for you both.’
I squeezed her arm affectionately. She kissed me on the lips fleetingly and said: ‘Love you, mum.’
‘Come on,’ I said. ‘Race you to the car!’
That evening brought the first night of the storms that were to last two awful days. We watched black clouds gathering from the west as the wind rose and began to screech through the trees that surrounded us, as if we were trapped in by them and they wouldn’t let us go.
We decided to stay in and not walk down to the pub that evening because of the wind. Two large pizzas were pulled from the little freezer and mum put the oven on. Dad opened a box of wine and poured us all a glass of east European cheap red wine. Whilst we ate we chatted about all sorts, Whitby, the railway, tomorrow’s plans and so on. Dan and Jess sat together and she was leaning in to him but I thought to myself, she always does that, it’s nothing new. After a brief silence when we were left to our own thoughts, Dan piped up:
‘After the meal I’m going to try out the hot tub. When it’s all going nicely and I know how it works I’ll come and see who wants to join me.’ He didn’t wait for any replies from the rest of us and made for the door humming to himself. As he reached the door he glanced at Jess and winked at her as he left.
The hot tub was in a large wooden lean-to annex to the cabin and you had to go outside to reach it. Inside it was well-lit with simple bench seats, hooks for towels and gowns and a CD player. None of us had ever been in a hot tub or operated one but we knew Dan would soon get the hang of whatever was needed. Indeed he soon came back.
‘I’m going to put a dressing gown on and I’m going in,’ he announced. ‘Anyone coming?’
Jess looked up and said: ‘Yes, me. Are you coming mum, dad?’
‘We may come along in a bit. We’ll see,’ I said.
Jess ran after Dan to their room. Dan was sorting through some CDs.
‘What are you doing, Dan?’ Jess asked.
‘There’s a CD player. I thought we’d have some music on.’
They both started to undress, half watching each other as they did. Jess paused and straightened herself, looking at Dan. She was just wearing her panties. Dan stopped and looked back at her. He was now naked. As he looked at his sister he picked up his dressing gown and put it on. For a moment he didn’t fasten it, he just looked at Jess. She smiled and put her fingers inside the elastic of her panties and pushed them down. She stepped out of them and took her gown off the hook behind the door where she had put it that morning.
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